The Founding Lump
A Historical Satire
“Every republic begins with a clerical error.”
Bartholomew Ignatius Lump arrives in Philadelphia carrying an ink satchel, a coat two sizes too important, and a letter of introduction he has written himself. His assignment is modest: deliver ink. His mistake is consequential: walk into the Continental Congress as though he belongs there.
Soon, a fortunate seating arrangement becomes a position of authority. Misunderstandings acquire the dignity of political principle, and questionable notes begin their journey toward the official record. Through Lump’s supposedly recovered papers, the founding of a nation unfolds as a comedy of confidence, committees, and people reluctant to admit that they have no idea who invited him.
Beneath the powdered wigs and spilled ink lies a familiar question: how much authority comes from wisdom, and how much from looking comfortable in the right chair?
The Founding Lump opens The Lump Series with an accidental political inheritance whose consequences extend well beyond the founding era. It is a complete, standalone story—and the beginning of a much longer misunderstanding.
Read the Book
Read the complete The Founding Lump as a PDF, or download a copy to enjoy at your own pace.